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The Top Ten Wife Jokes from Rodney Dangerfield

19 Jan Posted by in Jokes | Comments

Below are the The Top Ten Wife Jokes from Rodney Dangerfield:

  1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little Rodney-Dangerfieldbeverage, good food and companionship.  She goes on Tuesdays; I go on Fridays..
  2. We also sleep in separate beds.  Hers is in California, and mine is in Texas..
  3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back..
  4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary.  “Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!” she said. So I suggested the kitchen..
  5. My wife told me the car wasn’t running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She told me, “In the lake.”
  6. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days.  Then the mud fell off..
  7. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, “Am I too late for the garbage?” The driver said, “No, jump in!”
  8. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce..
  9. I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was ‘Always’.
  10. I haven’t spoken to my wife in 18 months.  I don’t like to interrupt her.


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